aka My roommate Sally Owens (Not her real name. The name was taken from the movie Practical Magic, you'll see why in a minute)
Back in Sonoma, where I went to college, I had one of the greatest roommates ever. Her name was Sally Owens. Sally and I lived in the same apartment complex but didn't know who each other was. She was getting tired of the people she was living with so she left her apartment 6 months early, from a 1 year lease, and my roommate had left 6 months early because his girlfriend was struggling affording a one bedroom apartment, so he moved out to go live with her. I had met Sally's boyfriend, Will Hayes (also not his name), in the dorms, so when I was in need of roommate and she was in need of a different living situation he made both of our problems go away.
The thing that must be said about Sally and I is that we were both TV addicted couch potatoes. There were 3 movies we watched. Thelma and Louise, Practical Magic, and Forces of Nature. She also got me hooked on Days of Our Lives. We watched Jennifer Love Hewitt's "How Do I Deal" music video religiously from the special features on the I Still Know What You Did Last Summer DVD, as well as overly playing the entire soundtrack of Practical Magic, which to this day I when I hear it I always think of her (almost cried when I heard Megan Hilty perform "A Case Of You," when she was a guest on my friend's show at a theatre). And we drank........a lot.
The Thelma and Louise night. This movie meant that she and Will got into a fight and she needed down time. I would come home from school and she would just be quiet sitting on the couch staring at the TV. All the lights would be turned off and if it was bad, the blinds would still be closed on the glass sliding door to the porch. The only light that was on came from the LED's in the TV. I would look, say Hi, go to the freezer and get two pints of ice cream and two spoons, sit on the couch next to her, and say "Thelma and Louise." A smile would happen and there it was. These nights were few but still something I remember. The other two movies would happen because we love Sandra Bullock and she LOVED Ben Affleck, which coincidentally at the time Forces Of Nature came out, I could hardly disagree. Practical Magic, though for some reason, was the movie that I remember most of all.
On a new release Tuesday, Sally and I went to Target so I could indulge in my dvd hoarding fetish. We came across Practical Magic. Neither one of us heard anything about this movie (this was during the days of dial-up and there was no such thing as internet phones, I am not even sure if I had cell phone yet, so there was no way of looking up any info about the movie) but the unknowing didn't stop me and I decided to get it anyway (hello, it has Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman, not to mention Stockard Channing and Diane Wiest). That night we watched it. Can I just say "Midnight Margaritas" and "Put The Lime In The Coconut". We were hooked. Within the week I bought the soundtrack.
As I said earlier Sally and I drank a lot. Well, one night Will came over and needed to use Sally's computer to do a term paper, or something like that, so Sally and I decided we would have some fun. I bought one of the huge costco half gallon bottles of Bacardi Limon (Which we both loved up to this point). In went the soundtrack, and the night just started. We just kept doing shots and shots of the magically smooth alcohol. All I can remember is that we were dancing to the "Coconut" song and by dancing I mean, running around the living room, jumping over the banister, and twirling in circles until we fell on the floor. This happened several times. Double shot and run the relay again. Sally's favorite song on the soundtrack was "Always on My Mind" and when that song came on we would just stand in place and kind of sway. Will stayed in his room, probably trying to drown out the chaos that me and his girlfriend were creating.
After several swayings and multiple relays, we were lying on the floor, heads up to the ceiling. I don't remember the song that was on at this moment, but it must have been one of the faster ones. Sally turned her head toward mine and said "I want to play a game." Saying ok was the straw that broke the camel's back. She said, "stare up at the ceiling," which was no problem because I was doing that already. "Find a spot on the ceiling to stare at," cool I can do this I thought. "Now shake your head as fast as you can." A brief moment of hesitancy took over but after all the shots it didn't last. So, there we were, shaking our heads. Room was spinning even harder now. "AGAIN!" When I stopped, everything was still moving and there was no way to focus on anything let alone the mark in the ceiling that was originally a random black dot, but has now vanished amongst the bleached white ceiling. "AND AGAIN!" About midway through I felt her hand touch my arm. I stopped and turned my head. Sally was trying to roll over.
Spinning myself, I accompanied her in her, what seemed to be a hopeless task, rolling over by pushing her arm to the other side of her body. I of course then rolled over and lifted up my head. Sally was now doing a baby crawl to her bathroom. This can't be good I had thought but was actually laughing at the time, remember - extremely drunk. I had tried to help her by pushing her from the behind to get her to crawl faster, which in case you didn't know, was not the best idea. I wound up pushing her and her arms gave out and face smacked the floor. "BLEHHHHH" followed by a "EEEEWWWWW GROSS." I looked and my fear was then realized, Sally just puked in hallway. Hearing the distracting noise of upchuck, Will opened up the bedroom door and saw the two of us just there trying to get Sally to the bathroom (we were both on our hands and knees still carefully moving around the discarded stomach remains). Will, being in shape cause he played soccer, lifted her up and helped her to the bright, newly cleaned might I add (She liked cleanliness), white porcelain God known as the almighty toilet. I at this point stood up, because I could control my drunkiness (or so I thought), and walked to the kitchen to find some receptacle for life fluid, water. I walked to her bathroom which is where Will had already had the shower going for steam (which she needed all the time) and he was just sitting there beside her. I didn't see Sally's face for the rest of the evening.
The next morning I woke up, reluctantly and hungover might I add. Walked into the living room, and on our dining room table there stood Satan himself. Two double shot glasses and a 2/3 empty jug of the once newly purchased Bacardi Limon container with the cap still off. I looked in the hallway to Sally's room and the puke had been cleaned (thanks Will) and Sally's door was closed. I put the shot glasses in the sink with water, put the bottle on top of the refrigerator, took a shower and headed out to class. Upon my return home I came in and saw my roommate staring at the TV, in our sun-less living room. I sat on the couch next to her, turned my head and said, "Thelma and Louise," and there it was.
The thing you have to understand is that Sally and Will both loved each other so much. They met in high school and came to Sonoma together. The fights were normal fights that lasted sometimes an hour or sometimes as much as a day. I never knew if Will had finished his paper that night, but for me at least, that night will always be etched in my brain. Bacardi Limon I can never drink again, and Sierra Mist happens to smell just like it, so goodbye to that as well. I tried Bacardi O and with no such luck that is erased from my drinkable alcohols as well.
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