Here's The Bootcamp Schedule Weeks 1-3

(DOW) - Fit Body Bootcamp + Beachbody P90x

Week 1-3

* (TH) - Cardio/Body Weight + Chest And Back, Ab Ripper X
(FR) - Weights + Shoulders And Arms, Ab Ripper X
(SA) - N/A + YogaX
(SU) - N/A + KenpoX
(MO) - Weights + Legs And Back, Ab Ripper X
(TU) - Cardio/Body Weight + Plyometrics
(WE) - Rest + xStretch

This works out so I can still do my Tuesday Night Trivia and recover on Wednesday. And Saturday I left to be a little easier just in case what of what Friday may bring, which is why Thursday and Friday are intense, to off set the weekend. Kenpo X, (I had to look it up too) from the description, seems to be cardio - self defense (punching and kicking, etc.) I refuse to skim through the video until the day I do it, to keep myself from anticipating the worst, so I'll let you know more about what it is when I do it.

Oh and 1 final thing, I am not posting weight weekly or daily anymore. I shouldn't be looking closely to the scale when you do weight training, so I will have markers from the start of week 1, followed by week 4, until the end of the 90 days. Depending on how the pictures turn out (yes there WILL be pictures), I will post those from week 1 on week 4. A set schedule on those I will not make, but I do promise there will be some (P90x requires them).

* The only change to week 1 I have to make so far is, I did not go to Body Fit in the morning on TH.
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Hello Again!

Alright, I am back. Hit a little depression streak with not having a job and finances being up in the air, but all is getting back to the norm-ish. I did go to Greece (end of June) and had a blast and it was so beautiful. I am extremely fortunate to have Grandparents who take all of the family on these trips once a year. Out of (my own) pocket expense = none, and the experience was unforgettable. Then I came home....

Nothing out of the ordinary, but unemployment was still at a stand still waiting government approval, which didn't get resolved, for me, up until the beginning of August. 2 months no money coming in and no jobs to speak of, other than clothing, and with a body like mine and not being female, it was not going to happen. But regardless, all that is in the past.

I am on a fresh start...again. Sound familiar, almost like the first post. New rules, new bootcamp, and a whole new set of weights.

Ok so we all know that Oprah's final season is upon us. My goal is to be off insulin and physically fit by the close of her season (which is around my birthday, which will be in time for my sweet sixteen times 2), with no plastic surgery to help me through. Why Oprah, you may ask, why not, I would answer. Her battle over weight and her guests' weight has been shown all through time on her show, and my battle has been through my whole life. So that's why! I am hoping to be fit before the season finale, but I am going to keep that as a goal and if it is sooner than, great!

New bootcamp:
http://www.beachbody.com/product/fitness_programs/best_sellers/p90x.do?tnt=P90X_SHAKE_A2&code=P90XDOTCOM
This will be a replacement for my normal bootcamp until I can start doing the payments again. Then I will be doing BOTH.

New weights:
I got a 160lb weight system (Bar and Dumbbells) at a sporting goods store for extremely cheap (due to wrong signage). Yay for me, bad for them.

So here I go again. First day was today, which was back and shoulders and some abs. I hurt and I am sore. So now I am going to relax in the pool. See you tomorrow.
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Hesitancy

Hesitancy

So, at this moment, there are exactly seven minutes before midnight, at which I turn 31. I need to get something off my mind and continue with my blog the way I intended it. Once this is done, everything else I want to talk about should come pretty easy.....

So the reason for the abrupt writer's block right after posting 4th grade is this. I was molested for many years and I do believe it started during that grade if not right before. It was not by a relative, but by my housekeeper's son. He was a few years older than me, and we went to the same elementary/junior high school, not to mention he stayed with us. I can't remember when or even how it started, but it continued for awhile.

As I said in an earlier post I think my parents must have figured out something, otherwise why the hell would they have sent me to School Counselor, because I forged their signatures on notes my teachers sent home, I think not.

As I grew older I never felt comfortable in my own skin, I never wanted to date, I always wanted to keep my friends real close, I was never comfortable with intimacy. For all these years I have been able to mask all my fears from the outside, but unable to mask them from myself.

I will never forget when I had a conversation with my mom and her friend, Susan Lowenstein, who was an extraordinary woman and psychologist. (remember I am using alias') The conversation went as follows, paint me a picture. That was it, not deep thoughts, no how are you feeling today, just paint me a picture. Not sure when this was (as you may figure out later, I will be saying that alot, my timeline is so fucked up from blocking out certain memories, that I forget when events happen and sometimes events all together), but here was/is my picture. A dark alley; the night had painted the bricks all around me a deep navy almost black color; there stood a little girl with her back to wall with a light that shone on her from the sky; she was wearing ragged clothes and had dirty hair and had a single tear that was running down her cheek. That was my picture, and that little girl was me, and there are times, that I still see her. I am not sure what Ms. Lowenstein, and my mom though at the moment, but I now finally know what it meant for myself.

Welcome to my blog!

It is now 50 minutes passed the hour that my birthday started. I am going to stop for now because as you all know, I have bootcamp in just a few hours. I said what I needed to say, in brief expect, more in depth as time passes.
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Day 58

Day 58

bootcamp 0500 - 0600
bootcamp 0645 - 0730

So both bootcamps today. Nothing really to report, although when Insanity Max say Max Recovery, it still means you sweat and it still hurts. Oh well, still moving along...
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Day 57

Day 57

bootcamp 0500 - 0600
bootcamp 0710 - 0805

After a grueling morning bootcamp I needed to take a little bit more of a break than I usually do. So I started the next one a little later than I had planned, but since I am un-employed I could do that. I also have to say that last night I was with my trivia team and out till midnight with them. I was so hungry that I had stopped by a subway to get my $5 dollar footlong. Sounded good at the time, but when I woke up this morning at 3:30, I could still feel that $5 dollar footlong nestling around in my stomach. I had to still eat breakfast (Jenny Craig Pancakes and Vegan Sausage) because I need the energy for bootcamp, not to mention I need it to take my pill in the morning as well. Well into the middle of the first bootcamp I think it finally rested and was able to continue without the nauseousness. But that's that.

I've included a gross video of me rinsing out the sweat from my T-shirt just to give you a glimpse of just how hard I am working to make my dream come true. Enjoy, but not too much because that would be weird. Enjoy the rest of your day, I know I will :)

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Day 56

Day 56

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0630 - 0730

Yeah, still not getting easier. These circuits are so freakin' hard. I put my shirt on the shower curtain rod and moments later, I see it start to drip. Gross I know, but you have no idea. Good news though I now know what a side push-up is, bad news.... I now know what a side push-up is. I must say that I am surprised that I am not sore (currently knocking on wood). Even though it is difficult it is do-able, and eventually I will get better. Till tomorrow blog followers, aka Mom and Dad.
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Monday to Monday Days 48 - 55

Day 48

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0600 - 0700

Jenny Craig -5 (which means I gained 6 since the first week)

So, clearly frustrated as far as weightloss, but let's face it I hardly consider this past week as an accomplishment with missing a few bootcamps here and there. As far as bootcamp goes I went to 2 of my class bootcamps, no Insanity today (which is scheduled as recovery week)

Day 49

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp N/A

I bowed out of the second bootcamp today. Not really sure what happened today. I am still a bit lazy, and I figure since it is recovery week in Insanity, if I just do my normal bootcamp, that should qualify as recovery for the second one. Like I said Lazy....but also have a huge day tomorrow.

Day 50

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
DISNEYLAND 1030 - 2130

Today is the day I go to Disneyland to celebrate one of my good friend's 40th birthday. I actually did really well today as far as eating, for I did not eat anything at Disneyland- just made myself a protein shake, one Jenny craig energy bar, 1 orange, and 1 bag of Jenny Craig popcorn, and I have to say I indulged a little and had 1 of those cream cheese filled pretzels (I know, but so good). In the day I feel pretty proud of myself, at night not so much. At the end of the day we all felt so tired, so on the way back, after dropping off all my friends, I went to pizza hut to order a pizza and chicken wings.....I had nothing all day, and I was starving and exhausted, pizza sounded so good.

Day 51

Bootcamp N/A
Bootcamp N/A

Do you honestly blame me. Disneyland was the cause of missing both bootcamps today, still so tired. All I did today was sleep......and finish the leftover pizza and chicken wings (I KNOW, bad DREW)

Day 52

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0700 - 0800

So back to a normal day today. I did the recovery exercise of bootcamp #2 and I have to say I know, now, why it is recovery. It is very slow and burns in each exercise but does not make you huff and puff like the other days. What a relief......

Day 53 Saturday....

Bootcamp N/A

Yes I took another day off. Leave me alone. I have been working my ass off (Literally) for the last month and a half or so.... This is the last day before the storm which is....... INSANITY MAX!

Day 54

Rest Day

Shut up! Yes another rest day, I get it.

Day 55

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0650 - 0750

Jenny Craig -15.8

First can I say, Holy EFFFING CRAP! Insanity Max is quite difficult. It's an hour opposed to 40-50 minutes. Each circuit feels like my shoulders are going to collapse. I feel like I am going to die! Ok now that that is done,

Jenny Craig not too shabby. I finally started losing weight again. Yay me!

Holy Crap that bootcamp hurt... Sorry for saying it again, but it really did.
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Sunday To Sunday Days 40 - 47

Day 40

bootcamp 1500 - 1540

Sunday, Mother's Day: So after a weird schedule I was finally able to do my cardio recovery. I realize today (Day 47) I should have done it sooner.....

Day 41

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0600 - 0700

Instead of doing 1 morning class and doing insanity, I just decided to double up the morning class. I hadn't seen my cousin for awhile, because he was sick, so I wanted to hang around and be his partner for the next hour. It was weight day, so it was tough, but do-able.

As Far as Jenny Craig was concerned I had gained 4 lbs. UGH! But as I said earlier, the weight will be bouncing around, but still, UGH!

Day 42

Bootcamp 0600-0700
Bootcamp #2 N/A

Instead of my trouble with the alarm, our bootcamp leader had the trouble this time. She had overslept and missed the first class, so I stayed at the facility until the second class started. I didn't have a chance to do insanity that day. On a good note though while our instructor was setting up for the 0600 class, I had a chance to get my measurements done. I lost 8% body fat since the first week of bootcamp (Totally makes up for how I felt at Jenny Craig), and most of the body measurements stayed the same, but the difference is, Not Flabby. You can now definitely see muscle development across my body, where it used to just be jiggly.

Day 43

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp #2 N/A

So I woke up today and wasn't feeling all that great. I think I must have eaten something yesterday because this morning, not good. And to add to it, My quads (Upper leg muscles) felt like they were going to bust out of my thighs. SO STIFF. The one thing I will say about my Bootcamp class, she loves to do legs, and man do I feel it. Because I wasn't feeling that great I opted out of the Insanity bootcamp afterward.

Day 44 + 45

NO BOOTCAMPS AT ALL :(

Today and Yesterday I woke up late and missed my bootcamps, STUPID ALARM! I also do believe I needed to take a small break from bootcamp because of the day of not feeling as well as just being too sore. Unfortunately that also meant I was taking the final week of normal Insanity off as well. Not sure what the plan is. Next week is a whole week of Cardio core and balance (or also known as Recovery Week) before I hit the Insanity Max Training!!!!! I am thinking I am going to go ahead with the Recovery week plan and just keep going on schedule even though I hit a snag with this week.

Day 46

bootcamp 0900-0950

Today I felt like a lazy ass, so I did my Insanity Bootcamp today. The first day after two days of nothing. It felt good, and fairly easy (Still hard, but a vast difference from the first week which is what I mean by easy). I am much more confident today about my decision to do the recovery week the following and moving on to the Insanity MAX!

As a side note I am glad I took a little break because I saw my cousin after the bootcamp session and he told me the morning class has been increasing in intensity and my instructor is tearing it up in class. UH OH!

Day 47

Relax day before the storm. I am going to be bringing it for the next 5 weeks. No more bullshit, and no more excuses, THIS IS IT. Sounds confident.....I AM.

This is now the end of a crappy week and the beginning of bigger and brighter things to come. Here I go.
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Days 38 + 39

Day 38

Bootcamp 0600-0700
Bootcamp #2 didn't happen :(

I woke up this morning at 0500 and was mad at my alarm clock for never going off. I was happy, though, that i did wake up at 5 on my own instead of waking up too too late. Since my bootcamp was an hour later, I went into the jacuzzi afterwards, at my parents place, to still have my daily dad visit. We make sure we are both on track on the diet, and shoot the shit, kind of how we used to when we worked together. I did not do the second bootcamp because my daily routine was off, so now for the week I missed 2 2nd Bootcamps, which I was not happy about, especially on Saturday.

Day 39

Bootcamp 0520-0600
Bootcamp 0815-0900

So both bootcamps were the two bootcamps I missed through the week. I have never done two insanity bootcamps after eachother, and for good reason. TOGETHER THEY KICKED MY ASS. That is why I waited a couple hours to recover from the first one. After missing one 2nd bootcamp the schedule was thrown off for the week, and then after the second one, it was just chaos. Cardio recovery is typically every wednesday, but since I did bootcamp on monday and nothing on tuesday, I decided to do a cardio workout on wednesday, and save the recovery till saturday, by which point I would do it after saturday's planned cardio workout. Then when i missed on friday, I now had to do 2 cardios on saturday and push the recovery back till sunday. I know u guys are sitting there saying who cares, but I am working hard to do this, and when things get messed up everything regarding my bootcamp schedule everything has to shift. Not only that but recovery is extremely important, and when that gets pushed, I get more sore throughout the week.

There is something though that I am afraid of and happy for, and that is, this is my last week of normally insanity training. Next week is Cardio and balance (for the whole week), and then it is MAX Insanity for the month. That first week will be interesting.
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Days 35 + 36 + 37

Day 35

Bootcamp 1 nope
Bootcamp 2 nope

Unfortunately I was feeling crappy today and ended up not going to bootcamp. I woke up at 0430 and got dressed. Sat down at the computer and I just felt a little lightheaded and dehydrated. I looked over at the clock and it read 0500, which was the time bootcamp started. I debated on whether to go and be 5-10 mins. late. I decided to wait till the 0600 and lay down for a little. Next thing I knew I woke up at 0820 and still didn't feel all that great. So no bootcamp for either session. :(

Day 36

Bootcamp 1 0500-0600
Bootcamp 2 0650-0730

I wasn't feeling 100 percent myself today, but I went to bootcamp regardless. I was so glad to go because I actually felt great afterwards. I haven't seen my cousin for awhile and decided to wait around the gymnasium to see if he'd show up. After about 20 mins. of waiting and debating whether I should do Bootcamp 1 again, I left. I didn't do it again, because I wanted to do Insanity today as well, because that too was neglected yesterday. I got home, sat at the computer to do some "brief" chores on the time sucking box, which is why Bootcamp 2 clocked in at 0650. My pool is being re-something and I now learn that it won't be done until June 15. So now after Bootcamp 1, I drive home to do bootcamp 2, then get back into the car and go to my parents place and use their pool/jacuzzi, then after, drive home and take a shower. Long morning..... But it's worth it.

Day 37

bootcamp 1 0500-0600
bootcamp 2 0630-0710

Felt great today: whatever wasn't working seemed to fix itself. Did both bootcamps, went to my parent's place and even did a few laps in the pool before the jacuzzi. Yesterday I did our bootcamp relay, which consisted of bicep curls + lunges, 2x instead of just once. Then today we did push-ups, and lots of things that involved plank position. Bootcamp 2 then reinforced the plank postions, along with burpies and push-up jacks. No wonder when I got into the pool my arms basically said, REALLY! And my brain just told them, "Suck it up, Upper Body strength." After the few laps my arms won the argument. I'll get back at them, because tomorrow is weight (fitness weights not body weight) day again. My arms shall not be thrilled with me after the two hours are done for tomorrow. Bring it on is all I gotta say at this point.

Oh and as a side note. I saw briefly what it is in store for Insanity Bootcamp (BC #2) for month 2, and I MAY JUST DIE. The one workout I saw is longer and more hard core. Luckily I have 2.5 weeks more to prep for it. I hope I make it out of this regiment alive to even go to Greece.
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Day 34 Contin.

Day 34 Contin.

Jenny Craig weight -11 for Week One

Th weight of the first day will be the starting weight. So I lost 11 lbs. since the first week. :)
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Day 33 & Day 34

Day 33
Rest Day
weight - 4

stuck to my diet this day, except for 2 drinks I had at night. Went to bed at 1200 and woke up at 0200 unexpectedly.

Day 34
Bootcamp 0500-0600 (YAY! They cancelled last week Thursday and Friday, so it was nice to see everyone.)
Bootcamp 0630-0700 (Fit Test Day)
weight -8

Fit Test Results
Day 1, Day 25, Day 34

Switch Kicks 30, 80, 83
Power Jacks 29, 35, 39
Power Knees 20, 64, 70
Power Jumps 17, 23, 21
Globe Jumps 4, 8, 10
Suicide Jumps 2, 4, 9
Push-Up Jacks 8, 22, 24
Low Plank Oblique 8, 40, 40

Pretty steady increase, except for the Power Jacks, but I must say this: I was jumping higher and landing a lot more controlled this week. I remember the last fit test and I may have stumbled on a few of the exercises. I am extremely happy with the results.

Now the weight.... That was before the water I drank today during the two workouts, so it may go up today. And today is also Jenny Craig day, so I will post that as an update after I go at 1100. First Week, had some downside, but now that morning bootcamp is full force again, I will be able to slip right back into my scheduled regiment.
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Missing Hat

Missing Hat aka
My Escape From The Eagle

Brief Story

So I was at The Eagle last night playing pool. I walk up to the bar to get another drink and this guy taps me on the shoulder. He looks in my eyes and tells me to come over to say something. I walk over a few feet where his other two friends are and he tells me that his friend thinks I'm hot. Now normally I would be flattered, but let's just say, if you took my type, invert it, keep him in a cave for about 2 years and throw him some clothing that came off of a shipwreck, you would come close to this guy. I am not superficial in the least, but come on! I am not even sure the guy could speak, because his friend was talking for him. I just kept smiling, and was waiting for my out-line to go back to the bar and get my drink. The next line out of the friends mouth was, "are you taken." I am not, but I did not disclose this information, so I simply said, "Kind of," followed by an immediately "sorry." So I left the three of them and headed back to the bar, ok, so no problem so far.

There was about an hour left before the bar started to kick people out, so I finished up my pool game and talked to one of my friends that was there. "Goodnight Everybody," is shouted repeatedly by the bouncer, followed by a "Bar Closed." So everyone merges to the street to discuss further plans of drinking, I just wanted to go home. I look over my shoulder and there are those three people again, and the one that was talking to me, looks over and smiles. I turn my head back around quickly and just look at my friend who is talking to his other friends. I say my goodbyes and head on out to my car which is parked across the street. Of course the car that is parked 2 behind me is those three boys'! I hear that one guy again yell, "You're hot." I awkwardly smile. By this point I am just trying to get to the car, but not in a way that would make them feel bad. I reach for the handle of my truck, open the door, and sit inside the driver seat. I turn the ignition on and headlights shine. What do I see out of my passenger side window, the same guy totally standing there. My car had inches from behind and front to maneuver to exit and finally drive off. The guy is still standing there the entire time I am forwarding and backwarding in my car. Finally the front of my car has emerged from the ass of the car in front of me, and what do i see in the headlights...... MY HAT. It was in my pocket because I got tired of wearing it and it must have slipped out while I was dodging cars to cross the street. With the guys still towards the rear of the truck I decided to Leave a man behind. So now, my favorite hat, is gone. I hope someone is enjoying it (tear).

I do have to say that I hate being embarrassed, so it wasn't so much the guys I had a problem with, so much as their shouting. It would be fine from someone that I liked, but not this. I had a choice, get out of my car, run to get my hat and maybe hear more from those guys, or drive off and just go home. I chose the second. I drove away and as I passed my hat I felt stupid as to why I didn't just pick it up, but by this time, I may have ran it over with my car. What could more embarrassing than jumping out of the car and running around it to get my hat in the middle of the street? Doing all that for a hat that I may have run over with my car, or could still be under the tire! So C'est la vie HAT.

I drove on the 101-110-10 (LA Freeways) back to my house. As my night was drawing to a close, I decided to get something to eat. I drove down Sawtelle and had no intention of going to Fatburger, but I haven't been there for years and I happened to drive in front of it while stopping at a red light. So that was my destination, must have been fate, or something. I got my brown paper bag of food, and came home to eat my brief sorrows away on an amazing hamburger (it was so good, I completely forgot about it. My family used to go there after a bad meal at an undisclosed relative's house).

This will be the second Hart and Huntington Hat I have lost/got stolen. The first one was due to an asshole of a roomate... But he will come up later in another post. Till the next post, goodbye Hat, goodbye.......

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Day 32

Day 32

Bootcamp (Insanity aka #2) 1000-1045

weight -3

I posted all my faults of yesterday in the day before this one, so I don't think I need to really a new update. I am excited for Monday though when i get reunited with my morning bootcamp class again. I have enjoyed sleeping in til' 1100 but I think I need the discipline of waking up at 0400 again. It makes me sleep early and also reduces the risk of eating so crappy. The days I have gone off, have been the days that I had no morning bootcamp.
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Day 31

Day 31

Bootcamp #2 1245
Bootcamp (Billys) Never wound up happening
weight -2

So I decided to do pure cardio which is the harder one of the week, and it also happened to be paired up with cardio abs. So I wanted to do full intensity and did those two at 1245 and decided that I really didn't need to kill myself and do a second set. So I didn't. I also realized that on day 30 that I had a day lagging for Jenny Craig, so I also chose to have an off day. I didn't go wild that day, but did have spaghetti for dinner with meatless meat. I was back on the bandwagon for Day 31, but I went to a friends show that evening and went out after, in which I drank. I also went out to fatburger because it was on the way back. Oh I know........ I haven't been there for years, and it is just as good as I remember, unfortunately. No mess-ups for Day 32. (I am posting this on Day 32, but will post Day 32 once I finish my bootcamp set and weigh myself.)
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Day 30

Day 30

Bootcamp (Billy Blanks) 1200-1245
Bootcamp #2 1300-1340

weight -3

Bootcamp #1 was cancelled for today and tomorrow, so i substituted it for Billy Blanks Bootcamp. I also realized that I didn't have to wake up so damn early today either, unfortunately I didn't come to this realization before I set the alarm, so after waking up at 4 this morning I rolled over and went back to bed. I woke up at 11, aaaahhhhhh! Got dressed for bootcamp, and did it. I did feel that the first disc of Billy's bootcamp was not as challenging as my early morning bootcamp, but then also remembered how tired I was after doing the dvd for the first time when i bought well over a year ago. So I was happy to know that I am getting stronger. Now for the Intensity Workout (aka bootcamp #2), today was cardio recovery. This is the second time doing this disc, and I must say, I sweat and hurt more in this than I did in Billy's. But regardless, at least I did it and still am moving. Tomorrow it will be Intensity first and then Billy's second disc second. I look forward to when I see my class on monday again.
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Day 29

Day 29

Bootcamp 0500-0600
Bootcamp 0630-0710

weight -1

My weight I would expect to be a little higher this morning. I ate more protein yesterday, to make sure I wouldn't lose muscle when working out, and also I had a problem with my blood sugar levels, and wound up eating 4 oranges in a matter of 10 minutes at midnight last night. My posts are going to be a little harder to do right at 8:30 now, because my pool is getting fixed. So I have to find new means to get my jacuzzi time in, which may mean traveling to my parents house until it gets fixed, which is what happened today. But anyways, no bootcamp #1 tomorrow and Friday, they have a trainer meeting or something, so i have to pick up an extra bootcamp somewhere. Regardless, i will still do two in the mornings to keep up with my regiment. til' tomorrow. I'm still going strong.....
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Day 28

Day 28

bootcamp 0500-0600
bootcamp 0630-0710

weight -3

I went to my friend's 1 year anniversary show, last night and had a few drinks. I thought that this morning's bootcamp was going to be difficult, but surprisingly it wasn't. It was however the time for Pure Cardio again for the second bootcamp., which is the one where there is a 30 min circuit with no rest. I find it hilarious when I put the DVD in, that even the guy on it says, I am afraid of what is going to happen with this exercise! That one was hard. I started having oatmeal with my protein shake in the morning to start me off on my regiment and it really helped. I also am doing Jenny Craig with a little upgrade, which is I am eating a little more protein than I am "supposed" to. With weights and 2 bootcamps under my belt every morning, I can't not have a deficient amount of protein, which then causes muscle deflation. We shall see how that will affect my weight loss. So until tommorow.

Just realized this is day ended my 4th week. Still going strong!
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Writer's block

Writer's Block, or more accurate Blogger Block.

I realize I stopped posting at grade 4. I haven't been too sure as to how to move on from here. As I said there was a situation that presented itself that year. I am still unsure if I am ready to post about it, but I am having a hard time posting anything else because it effected me all through my life, and it seems unfair to post stuff afterwards without explaining the situation. I will get through this block, it maybe a few more days though.
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Day 26 + Day 27

Day 26
Day of long awaited rest no bootcamp
weight +5 (bad food choices, really bad :( )

Ok so Day 26 was Sunday. The weight was morning of and this was the day I started Jenny Craig. As far as the weight is concerned I will be posting like I have, everyday. Starting a week from Monday, I will be posting the weight on my scale daily and the Jenny Weight, which is one a week. So on Saturday my Jenny weight was +8, again really bad food choices.

Day 27

Bootcamp 0500-0600
Bootcamp 0630-0710
weight +1
Jenny weight +8 (I am sure this has gone down since Saturday, but Monday will be my normal appointment at the center, so I am posting it as a starting off position)

I started the planned meals on Sunday and I have to say, it was a little harder than I had expected, but nonetheless, I was able to stick to it. Today (Monday) is the first day of planned meals with my bootcamp regiment. Bootcamp was a little tougher today than last week, so either the workout was harder, or I have to start eating before I head on out to the first bootcamp. A Protein shake alone doesn't seem to be working. I also started a GNC Mega Man Sport Supplement, so we shall see how that will come into play. My pee is already a bright radioactive neon yellow (caused by B-vitamins, not to be alarmed), so I guess it's going through the system. So here we go, it's officially 2 months till Greece. HOOOOOOOORAAAAAAAH!
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Day 25

Day 25

Bootcamp #1 Fit Test 0925-1000
Bootcamp #2 1015-1100
weight +4

Fit Test results
Day 1 is first number and Day 30 is Second number
Switch Kicks 30, 80
Power Jacks 29, 35
Power Knees 20, 64
Power Jumps 17, 23
Globe Jumps 4, 8
Suicide Jumps 2, 4
Push-Up Jacks 8, 22
Low Plank Oblique 8, 40

Major improvement. I feel better, People tell me I look better, but weight not changed, in fact gone up, although I do attribute it to the Chinese food of yesterday. However, I am starting Jenny Craig Tomorrow (already got the food) and the weight will change. Food of yesterday was my last meal of that nature for awhile, so that's why I ate it. Still have a lot of salt running through my system because I can feel it in my hands, and certainly when I did the bootcamps. I was only planning on doing one bootcamp today, which was the Fit Test, but I screwed up yesterday. Abs was not on the menu and I should have done a cardio circuit. So lucky me I did both the circuit and the fit test today, and it hurt. Karma is a bitch. Food = not a good choice in fact horrible choice, but I have reconciled with it.

Now tomorrow should be my day of rest, but if the pool is finally working I may do some cardio in there. I am excited.
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First Day Of Bootcamp

First Day Of Bootcamp

Ok, so everyone knows I started on a Tuesday for bootcamp. What people don't know is why. Prior to the first day, I was in a Trivia Team. Every Tuesday we would get together at 1900 and play til 2100. It was at a bar, so we (or moreso I) drank a lot, with no help from my friendly bartender. So the Sunday before the first day of bootcamp, I quit (it was one of many reasons). I decided that on Monday I should probably go out one last time and see some friends and my other bartender friend and have a one last night out before starting my new regiment.

Turns out, my one last was not the last night, and you saw why in the beginning posts, but the thought was there. My last night turned into a really late night. I started with seeing my friend's Musical Monday show at 2130, and drank with my bartender. (I do whiskey shots, and whiskey drinks, but mostly shots) After the show had ended, another trivia team, one that we actually really like, was there as well. After hearing of my decision to quit, I went outside and started drinking with them. After an hour or so, my friend, who does the show, invited me to go to another bar, where he and his boyfriend would be. So, knowing I was on my last hoorrah, I went. Drank more, with them and a couple of their friends. We all left at 0145 when the bar closed. Bootcamp started at 0600, so I headed home. I got home at about 0230 and fell asleep at about 0300. Alarm at 0500!

So by this time, I am sure people are wondering why did I even bother going. Well let me tell you. I knew that I would go out again on Tuesday to see my trivia team had I not have a reason, and hence it would happen again. If I waited until Wednesday to do this, I would probably opted to start the next week. So This was the best option, hungover, suck it up, and go!

0500, Alarm! I, with a headache, got out of bed, got dressed and waited for my cousin to pick me up and carpool on over there. I am feeling lousy and I realize I have no towel and a small bottle of water, what the hell was I thinking. I just assume I will talk to the instructor and just OBSERVE the bootcamp to see whether or not I wanted to do it. That didn't happen, first day up and running around the inside of this Gymnasium. To be honest I have no idea what we did that day, but it hurt and I was dehydrated beyond belief, and SWEATING, holy shit was I sweating. My cousin had been going there for about a month before, so he was introducing me to everyone. Reluctantly I didn't catch anyone's name and still don't know everybody's name, but they sure know mine. There was, though, a girl, who i know now, who had been calling me Alex the entire hour. I had no idea. I was so hungover and nearly passing out, people could have called me pretty much anything they wanted and I would answer. To this day now, a month she still calls me Alex, and I love it, because I am reminded of how I started my change.

1 hour went by, and it was finally done. The instructor looked at me and congratulated me on my brilliant first day, and everyone clapped in support for the first day. The instructor looked at me and said "I am so glad you didn't throw up, most people on the first day throw up". All I could say is "Thanks, I try." Little did she know that there were a few times that I was ready to just run to the bathroom and upchuck all the poison I drank the night before. But I didn't. "I just kept swimming....."

So that was my first day. Just to prove you don't have to be in your best condition to start a bootcamp, but just show up and give it what you can! That is the statement I have been on since I started and will continue to live on.
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Day 24

Day 24

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0630-0650

weight +2

Ok so I am glad i did the relay twice today in the first bootcamp because the 2nd one was just a 15 minute circuit of abs. And also I know that i said I wouldn't get frustrated with my weight, but.......So I am starting Jenny Craig tomorrow with my dad. Between the 2 bootcamps and Jenny Craig, I should see vast improvement in every area! I am excited. And also this day ends the first week of Double Bootcamp, and you know what, It is difficult, but not impossible. I am going strong and not giving up!
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Day 23

Day 23

Bootcamp 0500-0600
Bootcamp 0630-0730
Jacuzzi 0740 - 0815

weight +1

This morning was a tough one. Cardio for both bootcamps and the second was a 30 minute circuit with no rest. OUCH!!!! I had sushi yesterday, so a lot more salt than normal which may effect the weight, and I am also a lot more stronger than I was when I started, more muscle build up. Now if only I can lose fat.
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Day 22

Day 22

Bootcamp 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp 0640-0715
weight -2

It's now jacuzzi time!
Luckily Bootcamp #2 was just cardio recovery today.
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Day 21

Day 21

Bootcamp #1 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp #2 0630 - 0720
Jacuzzi 0730 - 0815
weight - 2

2nd Day of double bootcamp! HOOOORAAAAAAH! Still going strong! When the DVD set says Intensity Workout, my god, he wasn't kidding.
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Grade 4

Ahhhh 4th Grade.

Grades 1-3 were fine, but now we're heading into big kid territory. This is when you no longer needed a bathroom buddy, we got lockers, and we changed classrooms for Math or English. So grown-up! I had a great Homeroom teacher who also happened to be our everything teacher, except for math. The other 4th grade class got taught everything by their homeroom teacher but english. For those two we switched teachers. Ok so now that is out of the way......

The school was teaching us some independence, and I learned it. I thought it was very independant of me to choose to not do my homework. I am a firm believer to this day, students should not be required to do homework if they know the material, otherwise it is just busy work. I have always been a math brain, and though I admit a bit rusty, I can learn math with no problem. English, however, not so, like you couldn't tell! Math homework was stupid, I knew had to subtract and multiply and divide and add for crying out loud, why do I have to do 100 problems to prove that! (I am still a bit bitter. As a side note, I would have gotten an A+ in Pre-Calculus in College, but I didn't do my homework, so he gave me B.) Now I had also chose to not do English homework as well, I hated English, still do in fact! (and when it came time to the SAT tutor in High School, the English tutor asked if English was my first language and/or if I was a special needs kid. No Joke, the only reason I got a good score on the English section is because I saw the movie Joy Luck Club which the novel was on the section of read a page and answer questions based on the reading section. See movies save people from academic failure.) I am getting used to English a bit more since I started reading and writing this blog, although an English aficionado would have a field day with my conjugation and word usage!

back to the story....

I learned that not doing homework had consequences, such as notes home from the teacher. This is where my parents story and mine don't mix. I had forged signatures on those notes for awhile before I got caught. I used the carbon copy trick from my Dad's checks. After I learned the motion of his hand, I was able to sign, and still can, without any help from an old check. My mom's signature was the hardest because it was close to perfect cursive, and by then I had not learned how to do that very well. So after a couple months of these stupid notes, I finally got caught, not necessarily because of the signature, but more so, when the teachers asked what my parents said to me, I would say "I don't know" and I would shrug my shoulders. My ambiguity tipped off the teacher, and my parents were sent in the next day. By this time, I also had learned this great technique of zoning out, so I can't remember what was all said, but I am sure it wasn't good. Now here's where my parents have a different version, a few months after this they get sent in again. Same reasons, not doing homework, forging signatures, yadda yadda yadda. They get mad again, and ask me why did I do it again, I got caught the first time already, why tempt fate again! And my response to this day is still, you caught me twice, and I forged more than 20 signatures that year. 2 out 20 not bad, that's a B. The only problem was, that my grade in school was not a B. So this where my parents set me up with a tutor to catch me back up, who was a wonderful lady. She helped me out a lot.

Oh and I forgot to mention, but somewhere in between the two times my parents went into class to talk to my teacher (excluding parent/teacher night) they sent me to the school Psychologist. They wanted to find out why I was doing the things I was doing. What moron has to ask a 4th grader why he has to forge signatures on bad notes from school, clearly the answer is; I didn't want my parents to get mad at me. As I am writing this story, I wonder if my parents knew something was wrong. This is around the same time that I was in the situation that I am not comfortable talking about yet. Perhaps...... That story is not going to unravel yet. It is going to have to be later. Sorry for that, but you'll understand.

So all and all, I passed 4th grade. I am sure not with flying colors, but by a thin hair and a lot of personality. :) Let's face it, my teachers loved me. I got out of many situations because of this. This was also the year when we were asked by our homeroom teacher what we wanted to be when we grow up. I remember because I actually got laughed at. By this time all the boys wanted to be firefighters or police, or something of that nature, but me. I wanted to be a chef. The funny thing is, I can actually say that that has happened, not professionally, but neither was Martha Stewart. I love to cook and almost wanted to go to school a few years ago to master in it, but tuition is expensive and I am not sure if I want to do it as a hobby, or to make money, we'll see.

until next time.......

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Day 21

Day 21

Bootcamp #1 0500 - 0600
Bootcamp #2 0630-0730

weight -2

It's pool time. Who said that having two bootcamps in a day was a good idea? I should shoot myself.
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Grades 1 - 3

I grew up in the Hills of Beverly ever since I was 5. I went to a public school from 1st grade to 8th grade and then the public High School, so yes in case you didn't know I went to West Beverly. I knew Brandon, Brenda, Luke Perry, Steve, Kelly and, yes, even Andrea (in case you were wondering, that is the cast of the first Beverly Hills 90210). That statement seems a little outdated now, but you would not believe some of the questions I used to get way back when. So let's clear some basic facts, there is a Beverly Hills High School, but it does not have a 90210 area code, there is no such thing as West Beverly Hills High, and finally the cast never came to film episodes.

I digress, sorry.

So first grade not too much happened that I remember other than my teacher was not a nice person. I will never forget the day she threatened to glue a kids butt to the chair because he kept standing. To me now, I fully understand and laugh, but back then it seemed like she was the Balrog of Moria, the fire breathing beast from the depths of hell, from the Lord Of The Rings Movie (which I know, the movie comes out after my first grade teacher, but I never knew a great comparison until now). Only problem we had no Gandolf to deafeat it.

Second grade, I could just skip entirely, except that the first day of class I was talking to a girl and was called out by the teacher. She made me stand up (we were all sitting on the floor in the front of the classroom for, I guess what would be, orientation). She looked right at me and said "stop talking, do you want me to switch you to another classroom?" I said "yes." I do not make that up, she gave me an evil eye and made me sit back down. I guess her curse wound up working because that was the year I got pneumonia and had to miss school for a month, possibly longer. I even think that started an episode of hives at some point. On the plus side, when I wasn't wheezing or nearly, you know, dying, I got to know Bob Barker on "The Price Is Right." Many a day I would be home to watch that. I'm not sure how I passed that year, I guess lucky for me they don't teach too much in second grade that I couldn't handle, or maybe I had a tutor, oh well, who remembers now?

Third grade I had one of the best teachers. She was so old, but one of the sweetest people. All the kids loved her. That was the year that I learned something new. I was legally blind. On a sunny day, all the students went Madeline style down to the nurse's station (Madeline Style - two lines, one side girls and the other side boys, walking in straight parallel lines, also could be called Village Of The Damned Style). Each one of us would go through the dreadful, eyesight test. I was toward the back of the line. One by one my classmates would be finished and compare notes. "20/20" all the children would spritely say (I so wish I could say that (tear)). It was up to me now. I didn't want to fail and actually asked another kid what some of the letters were, cause clearly I couldn't see them, and He told me. With my heart pounding, and shakes of nervousness overcoming me, I started saying the letters that he told me, which would have worked, but I remembered only about half of them. It was pure blurriness all the way. My attempt at remembering the letters, however brave and amazing I was, was not enough to fool the nurse with her checkboard. Whatever happened, this student was not getting a passing grade for this test. I came back to the room where all my classmates were enjoying their break off from class, and with no excitement, I said "I have to talk to my parents." (I do realize that looking back it should not have been so traumatizing, but I did want to fit in so much, and I thought because I was the only one with glasses in the whole class, I would be singled out. Even then I had self esteem issues, which may be normal for that age?!?)

To make my long story short from then on I would have glasses that even Ugly Betty herself would not wear. I had one pair that people still remember, they were oval lenses and a hoop-like ear thing, so they wouldn't come off my face (I used to sleep in all my glasses because I would fall asleep to the TV. The next mornings, though, finding my glasses would be like finding a needle in a blurry haystack). Did I mention, they were also bright RED. Red was my favorite color and I got a few different glasses in that color. New prescription = New glasses. The one thing I will say, it did make my make-believe-I-was-superman time a lot more convincing, although when I threw the glasses off my face I would look like Velma from Scooby-Doo. Hands and arms out searching the carpet, praying I did not hear a crack from beneath my knee. Oh it happened a few times.

Back to third grade, so here I was with my new pair of glasses. I walk in slowly, and go to my desk, waiting to hear something funny about my eyes. Alas, nothing, but there was one girl who did say something. Her name was Madison. (taken from the movie Splash because like Daryl Hannah was extremely tall and had golden hair) She said "Nice Glasses," and gave me a big smile. I smiled back and said "thank you." My nerves went down and my emotional shield faded away. It was the sweetest thing anyone could have told me. At a sigh of relief and happiness, I took a seat at my desk with a smile. We became good friends from then on. (it's a story like that, that I had completely forgotten about until I started writing this blog)

As a side note.....I must say I never knew what the teacher was writing so diligently on the blurry board prior to my newly acquired vision repairers. Unfortunately I found out, HOMEWORK!

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Days 17 -20

Days 17 - 20

No Bootcamp :(
Weight -1

So I have been sick for the last few days and am finally on my last day of antibiotics. Tomorrow I do plan to go to bootcamp so Yay for that. I was so dehydrated and didn't eat anything during Day 15, which explains why the weight went down so much on Day 16. I started eating again and drinking a lot of Powerade Zero, and finally am feeling much better, and so is my weight unfortunately :). But time to start again. I know that I said that I would start the second set of bootcamp after the first set, well that isn't going to change. So bring on the week.
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Day 16

Day 16

Bootcamp Didn't happen
weight -7

I still wasn't feeling well last night and decided to stay at my parents for the night. The sickness I was feeling felt closely related to pancreatitus, which I had two years ago, and is not a pleasant thing. I went to the doctor this morning and found out it was some food poisoning issue instead, FEW! But despite what it is, there shall be no bootcamp for the rest of the week. But on the lighter side of things my weight was lowered. Until tomorrow!
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Day 15

Day 15

Bootcamp 0500
Weight -3

Despite my stomach being really annoying yesterday and this morning, I went to bootcamp still. And wouldn't you know, we worked on abs. UGH! I feel a little off today so I am going to take a sick day and stay in bed, until I feel better. Til' tomorrow.
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Day 14

Day 14

Bootcamp 0500
weight -3

Great workout this morning! It was hard but fun.
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Day 13

Day 13

No Botcamp (sunday)
weight 0

That's right back to the original weight again. +4 from yesterday vanished without a trace.
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Alcohol Story - Why I can't Ever drink Bacardi Limon Again

Alcohol Story - Why I can't EVER drink Bacardi Limon Again and Sierra Mist Oddly
aka My roommate Sally Owens (Not her real name. The name was taken from the movie Practical Magic, you'll see why in a minute)

Back in Sonoma, where I went to college, I had one of the greatest roommates ever. Her name was Sally Owens. Sally and I lived in the same apartment complex but didn't know who each other was. She was getting tired of the people she was living with so she left her apartment 6 months early, from a 1 year lease, and my roommate had left 6 months early because his girlfriend was struggling affording a one bedroom apartment, so he moved out to go live with her. I had met Sally's boyfriend, Will Hayes (also not his name), in the dorms, so when I was in need of roommate and she was in need of a different living situation he made both of our problems go away.

The thing that must be said about Sally and I is that we were both TV addicted couch potatoes. There were 3 movies we watched. Thelma and Louise, Practical Magic, and Forces of Nature. She also got me hooked on Days of Our Lives. We watched Jennifer Love Hewitt's "How Do I Deal" music video religiously from the special features on the I Still Know What You Did Last Summer DVD, as well as overly playing the entire soundtrack of Practical Magic, which to this day I when I hear it I always think of her (almost cried when I heard Megan Hilty perform "A Case Of You," when she was a guest on my friend's show at a theatre). And we drank........a lot.

The Thelma and Louise night. This movie meant that she and Will got into a fight and she needed down time. I would come home from school and she would just be quiet sitting on the couch staring at the TV. All the lights would be turned off and if it was bad, the blinds would still be closed on the glass sliding door to the porch. The only light that was on came from the LED's in the TV. I would look, say Hi, go to the freezer and get two pints of ice cream and two spoons, sit on the couch next to her, and say "Thelma and Louise." A smile would happen and there it was. These nights were few but still something I remember. The other two movies would happen because we love Sandra Bullock and she LOVED Ben Affleck, which coincidentally at the time Forces Of Nature came out, I could hardly disagree. Practical Magic, though for some reason, was the movie that I remember most of all.

On a new release Tuesday, Sally and I went to Target so I could indulge in my dvd hoarding fetish. We came across Practical Magic. Neither one of us heard anything about this movie (this was during the days of dial-up and there was no such thing as internet phones, I am not even sure if I had cell phone yet, so there was no way of looking up any info about the movie) but the unknowing didn't stop me and I decided to get it anyway (hello, it has Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman, not to mention Stockard Channing and Diane Wiest). That night we watched it. Can I just say "Midnight Margaritas" and "Put The Lime In The Coconut". We were hooked. Within the week I bought the soundtrack.

As I said earlier Sally and I drank a lot. Well, one night Will came over and needed to use Sally's computer to do a term paper, or something like that, so Sally and I decided we would have some fun. I bought one of the huge costco half gallon bottles of Bacardi Limon (Which we both loved up to this point). In went the soundtrack, and the night just started. We just kept doing shots and shots of the magically smooth alcohol. All I can remember is that we were dancing to the "Coconut" song and by dancing I mean, running around the living room, jumping over the banister, and twirling in circles until we fell on the floor. This happened several times. Double shot and run the relay again. Sally's favorite song on the soundtrack was "Always on My Mind" and when that song came on we would just stand in place and kind of sway. Will stayed in his room, probably trying to drown out the chaos that me and his girlfriend were creating.

After several swayings and multiple relays, we were lying on the floor, heads up to the ceiling. I don't remember the song that was on at this moment, but it must have been one of the faster ones. Sally turned her head toward mine and said "I want to play a game." Saying ok was the straw that broke the camel's back. She said, "stare up at the ceiling," which was no problem because I was doing that already. "Find a spot on the ceiling to stare at," cool I can do this I thought. "Now shake your head as fast as you can." A brief moment of hesitancy took over but after all the shots it didn't last. So, there we were, shaking our heads. Room was spinning even harder now. "AGAIN!" When I stopped, everything was still moving and there was no way to focus on anything let alone the mark in the ceiling that was originally a random black dot, but has now vanished amongst the bleached white ceiling. "AND AGAIN!" About midway through I felt her hand touch my arm. I stopped and turned my head. Sally was trying to roll over.

Spinning myself, I accompanied her in her, what seemed to be a hopeless task, rolling over by pushing her arm to the other side of her body. I of course then rolled over and lifted up my head. Sally was now doing a baby crawl to her bathroom. This can't be good I had thought but was actually laughing at the time, remember - extremely drunk. I had tried to help her by pushing her from the behind to get her to crawl faster, which in case you didn't know, was not the best idea. I wound up pushing her and her arms gave out and face smacked the floor. "BLEHHHHH" followed by a "EEEEWWWWW GROSS." I looked and my fear was then realized, Sally just puked in hallway. Hearing the distracting noise of upchuck, Will opened up the bedroom door and saw the two of us just there trying to get Sally to the bathroom (we were both on our hands and knees still carefully moving around the discarded stomach remains). Will, being in shape cause he played soccer, lifted her up and helped her to the bright, newly cleaned might I add (She liked cleanliness), white porcelain God known as the almighty toilet. I at this point stood up, because I could control my drunkiness (or so I thought), and walked to the kitchen to find some receptacle for life fluid, water. I walked to her bathroom which is where Will had already had the shower going for steam (which she needed all the time) and he was just sitting there beside her. I didn't see Sally's face for the rest of the evening.

The next morning I woke up, reluctantly and hungover might I add. Walked into the living room, and on our dining room table there stood Satan himself. Two double shot glasses and a 2/3 empty jug of the once newly purchased Bacardi Limon container with the cap still off. I looked in the hallway to Sally's room and the puke had been cleaned (thanks Will) and Sally's door was closed. I put the shot glasses in the sink with water, put the bottle on top of the refrigerator, took a shower and headed out to class. Upon my return home I came in and saw my roommate staring at the TV, in our sun-less living room. I sat on the couch next to her, turned my head and said, "Thelma and Louise," and there it was.

The thing you have to understand is that Sally and Will both loved each other so much. They met in high school and came to Sonoma together. The fights were normal fights that lasted sometimes an hour or sometimes as much as a day. I never knew if Will had finished his paper that night, but for me at least, that night will always be etched in my brain. Bacardi Limon I can never drink again, and Sierra Mist happens to smell just like it, so goodbye to that as well. I tried Bacardi O and with no such luck that is erased from my drinkable alcohols as well.

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Day 12

Day 12

I actually got to sleep in today. After waking up at 0200 on Friday morning, I did not go to sleep until 0300 Saturday Morning; went out drinking with many different friends. When the night was finally over, I got to sleep in till 1000 this morning. AHHHHH! Not too much to report, played hard yesterday and had some minor mishaps because of it. Did not eat from about 1700 til 0200 the next morning and kinda stopped at dell taco...... I know not a great place for eating especially when I am going to bootcamp.... But I promised to post weight even if I would prefer to not to. This is after breakfast and lunch so the true number will be tomorrow morning. but here it is as of 1430...

weight +4
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Day 11

Day 11
Happy Friday!

Bootcamp 0500 (Yes I did sleep this time)
weight -1

This day marks the end of the second week. Feeling good. At the end of week 3 I am going GUNG HO! on a new regiment which combines both the morning bootcamp and a second DVD based bootcamp. At least that's the plan anyway. I have a cruise of Greece planned at the end of June with the family and need to be more fit. Happy Weekend everyone.
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Day 10

Day 10

Bootcamp 0500 (yeah baby!)
weight -2

So I wasn't planning on drinking last night, but it happened. 2100-2400 was drinking with a friend, and then we caught up to a couple more friends. I had stopped drinking at 12, but stayed up til 0400 talking with everyone, and eventually got home at 0430. Dilemma came. Do I stay at home for another hour and go to bootcamp at 0600, which may turn out falling asleep and missing it entirely, or do I suck it up and go to bootcamp at 0500. Well I went at 0500 and I couldn't be happier. Although I did prove the theory that if you drink the night before bootcamp and have no sleep, you sweat 3 times as much. Gross I know, but a valuable lesson. Ooooooh, but look, weight went back down. YAY!
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Day 9

Day 9
Bootcamp 0600 :)
weights galore

weight +2
1 word pizza. UGH!

Watching american idol last night I kind of had a little too much pizza for dinner and to insult to injury also ate the grilled chicken from KFC for lunch. I know, I know, BAD DREW! At least I am posting it, so I know I can't get away with it! To A Better Tomorrow!
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Day 8

Day 8

Bootcamp 0000 :(
weight +1

So bootcamp didn't happen this morning. Instead I was dealing with a lil' bit o drama so I didn't get home til 3:45 am. Tomorrow full force!
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Day 6 + Day 7

Day 6
Sunday - Day Of Rest

Day 7
Bootcamp 0605 (a little late sorry cousin)
Weight +1
Weight went up from initial. Not a big deal. Had a birthday party over the weekend and food tended to be more salty than I prefer. Also as I keep telling people, The weight number doesn't matter so much to me as the inches on my chest and waist do (which will be measured tomorrow as a starting point for me). The thing is, I was on Jenny Craig a few years ago and lost 40 pounds (and regained it again, hence the bootcamp.) I was in a 6 week bootcamp about 10 months ago, never lost any weight, but was able to wear the same clothing I did when I lost the 40 pounds in Jenny Craig. Jenny Craig made me smaller, but bootcamp made me more muscular, and me I, like muscles.
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Day 5

No Bootcamp
10 miles 3 hour walk
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Adoption Story

(Parents (or mom/dad) = adoptive parents, Birth parents = well birth parents)
This is according to stories that I was told, but my parents may clarify some holes in my story.

As I said earlier, Mom and Dad were trying to have a baby and couldn't, and at the time mom was a lawyer, and through telling everyone they knew that they wanted to adopt a baby they found a couple willing. My birth mom was 19 and my birth dad was 20. She accidentally got pregnant and decided that having a baby was not the right choice for her, so she decided to give it up for adoption. The criteria they had for choosing the right family was more about the quality of the family, not the religious persuasion, even though they came from a Roman Catholic background. They found a nice Jewish couple with an 8 year old son with a huge paternal extended family all confined in the Los Angeles area and the maternal extended family in Texas. Papers were drawn up and when the time came, my birth parents were to give me up.

I was born At 5:30/5:45 in the morning (can't remember) on Memorial Day, May 28th, 1979. The attorney called my parents mid-afternoon on memorial day. First thing that was said to my Dad was "congratulations papa,". Next thing said was not as great. My parents were told not to go to the hospital before the next day. The first day off limits, but when the next day's sun rose high and bright , my parents rushed to the hospital to greet me, and what they found was my grandma (dad's mom) already holding me. It seemed they were not the only eager one's to get a glimpse of the new Frankel. But as I said before, there was a few reasons why the day lag had to happen.

There were moments when my birth father had a change of mind and wanted to keep me, and the attorney persuaded him not to. I believe he said something to the effect that if he wanted to pay all the hospital bills and be responsible for a child, then there is nothing to stop him, but if you want the child to grow up in a secure family that he will be taken care of, he should really go through with the adoption. My birth mom had her own reservations as well. While giving birth she had some complications and was told that there were some tests that had to be made to determine whether or not she could have another baby. Prior to being born she wanted to make it easier on her by giving birth and not seeing me. But while she was still in the hospital getting treated, both she and my dad played with me, which made the decision even harder. Out of sight out of mind was the primary instinct but it just didn't happen like that. In the end the decision was made and they both signed the papers and I had myself a second set of parents, who are of course my first and foremost parents.

Now at this point custody was already legalized, but the hospital was a little unsure about their reimbursement. I was already born and my parents paid for all the medical bills up until then. The problem was my birth mom was still in the hospital getting treated and the hospital held me for, as my dad says, "ransom" until they made sure they got their money.

Everything was supposed to be a bit easier. I was born ready to go, my birth parents had reservations, Birth mom is still getting treated, and the hospital is holding me for "ransom" because they needed money. My poor parents, things were looking up though for them, fortunately, after 3 days of this. So, as you might have guessed, it all worked out in the end, I was finally legally adopted and was finally ready to go home.

All newborns, at that time, were taken out of the hospital by the mom in the wheelchair. Since neither of my parents gave birth to me, my dad decided he would be the one to take me out of the hospital in the wheelchair, it was hospital policy after all. They put me in the car and immediately my new 8 year old brother looks at me and says, "haha, you're adopted!" He wanted to be the first one to tell me. Already at eight he was a smart ass. He and I got along like normal brothers would, I too became a smart ass, and so did our youngest brother. A family of smart asses. (better than being dumb asses as we always say) So to this day, My older brother was an accident (my parents were not planning to get pregnant that early), My younger one was supposed to be a girl, and me, well I am the "chosen one" (imagine a little halo with a bright light shining down and a choir singing when I say that, I always do....A little cocky I know, but I'm allowed to be.)

Now before the question comes up, no I have not yet seen my birth parents, and am not sure I want to. I think I may have located my birth mother, but it really is going to take some time for me to know if that is something I really want. Maybe through the course of this time for change, I will make my decision.

Til' next time

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Day 4

Bootcamp 0600
weight -2 (From Original)

End Of The First Week. Happy Friday!
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Day 3

Bootcamp 0600
weight -4 (from original, not from the day before)
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Day 2

Bootcamp 0600 hours
weight -3
(remember it is from the initial weight, and I expect this number to fluctuate throughout the week)
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Welcome to My Blog

So here it is, my blog. I am an overweight, 30 year old (soon to be 31, Yay Gemini) gay male struggling to find the right place to be me. I am extremely unhappy with how I look and it negatively impacts my hopes and dreams of one day finding that someone special. So why should anyone care? I don't know, your reading this I'm just typing.

I was born and raised in the Los Angeles area and never left except for College - Sonoma State - which resides in wine country (county?!?). I have two brothers, one sister-in-law (who I just call my sister), and a mom and a dad. My parents, after the first pregnancy, were trying to have a second child and were having trouble succeeding, so they did what people do and adopt a child, ME. Four years after me, they decided to have a 3rd child and hoped that the next was a girl, but it wasn't. Oh well, no girls but three boys (which actually turned out to be 2.5 boys seeing that I came out when I was 27). So here I am, The adopted, middle, overweight, gay 30 year old son.
I keep mentioning overweight because that is why this blog was created. I just started boot camp today and hopefully by the time my blog ends I will have improved on my current "not happy" status. Oh and also I am not posting weight on this, it will just be in negative integers (and possibly positive integers) to express what I lost and hopefully not gained.

For right now that is all I got.... When I get more comfortable My life shall be unfolding and hope that I come to some realization after everything is said and done. For a glimpse of what is to unravel, there's: cancer, diabetes, near death experiences, and something I am not yet comfortable talking about. Welcome, and I hope you stay with me through this journey.

Day 1
Bootcamp 0600 hours
weight 0
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